Planning isn't always productive

I'm a planner. I always plan ahead. Trying to conceive (TTC) was no different. Thinking led to discussions. Discussions led to decisions and decisions led to a timeline being set. Instantly my compulsion to plan everything kicked in.

We began talking about trying to start a family about 2 and a half years ago. In October 2004, we agreed that we would start trying the next summer. (Did I mention that I also research everything? - Well I do.) So I immediately turned to the internet to learn more about the TTC process. I discovered that there was there was a TTC "bible" of sorts. I ordered Toni Weschler's book, Taking Charge of Your Fertility and waited with baited breath for it to arrive.

I read TCOYF cover to cover within 3 days time. I felt inspired and empowered to get to know my body better and figure out what it was up to. I talked it over with my DH and took my last birth control pill November 6, 2004. I began charting my basal body temps and other fertility signs a few days later. We used a combination of the new skills I was learning with the Fertility Awareness Method and condoms (as necessary) for contraception while I continued to plan and research in preparation for the summer when we'd make the leap to TTC. Little did I know that was probably an unnecessary "precaution."

As I charted my temps and fertility signs week after week, I was frustrated to learn that my body was confused and didn't have a clue about what a "normal" menstrual cycle was supposed to be like. My cycles were longer than the normal "24 - 35" days. They were also unpredictable, widely varying in length. I thought that surely things would improve as my ovaries realized no birth control pills were preventing them from doing their thing. My doctor agreed at my pre-conception appointment. Months went by. No change. My body was still out of whack. I was ovulating each cycle according to my bi-phasic charts, but ovulation was late and sporadic in timing - hence the irregular cycles.

By this time, I was becoming a bit of an expert layman on reproductive system and fertility issues. I participated in TTC communities on WebMD and shared my research with others, all while learning even more from those who had been trying awhile. I hoped that all my planning and preparation would make for quick success when we started to try and get pregnant. I knew as much as I could know about my own cycles and knew what to do to make my best effort at conceiving naturally.

Summertime came. We celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary and pulled the goalie in July 2005. I was in the midst of my "marathon cycle" which ended up being 66 days long. I saw my gynecologist again during that time. She recommended we keep trying for 6 - 7 months, but suggested that my cycles may make things more difficult to conceive, even with "perfect" timing of sex. I heard her say I might need medication to help have a better ovulation, but I put that out of my mind and we enthusiastically tried our best to get knocked up.

Here we are almost 9 months later - still trying. I've conceded that it looks like we'll need some help to make our dreams of a baby come true and that my cycles really are problematic. (Women in their late 20s can take up to 12 months to conceive and be considered normal, but with good timing - evidenced by BBT charts..etc - it should happen closer to the average timing of 4 - 6 cycles.) If you have ovulation issues, as I appear to, then many doctors recommend you seek help earlier and not waiting until a year is up. I've made an appointment to see my gynecologist on April 26th. We are prepared to begin some basic fertility testing and probably some oral medication.

So that is how my journey started and I'll take you along for the rest of the rollercoaster ride.